For me love stories are forever. Some of them are from Jane Austen novels and some from the movies. This post is about my favorite actor who reminds me of the magic in romance, and why it will never work for me!
When I watch Audrey Hepburn movies, I want to…..
Find the right english gentleman
ME: I washed me face and hands before I come I did.
HE(slouches): where the devil are my slippers?
(If only there was a man who loved me even after I promptly threw ‘them slippers’ at him in an estrogen fueled rage!)
Go to the bar just to use the best pickup line ever “I don’t bite you know … unless it’s called for,”(how would I know it worked? If I woke up alone next morning in a strange apartment with a nasty hangover)
Write a diary and start the first entry with
“When I finally say I love you to any man and really mean it, it will be like a defeated general who’s lost all his troops, surrendering and handing his sword to the enemy.” (And follow that up with pages of conquests that will put my ‘oh-so-slutty’ girlfriends to shame)
Go to a ball and look disdainful so no one would know its my first! And end up dancing with my Prince Andre. (But Mom!! So what if he is a widower and old enough to be my dad? He is a very hot Russian)
Be a real phony. Own a cat just so I could call her “cat you poor no name slob” (all that just so I could fall in love with a ‘can barely earn enough to get a cracker-jack ring engraved at Tiffany’s’ writer)
Get high on phonetics(who needs weed?!) and dance to ‘the rain in spain stays mainly in the plain’ in the middle of the night!
Sing ‘I can do without you’ in the shower without it sounding like something Miley Cyrus would twerk to.
Sneak out in the middle of the night and pretend I am Princess Ann from the Roman Holiday! Fall in love with a beautiful stranger. Look at those who don’t approve(Mom) and say, “Were I not entirely aware of my duty to my family and my country, I would not have come back tonight… or indeed ever again!”(Yeah you heard me! Wait a minute, did I give up on my perfect love story just to see the look on my Mom’s face? How damaged am I?)
And yes…. dream in black and white (because to say I dream in color is like saying I dream I am in bed with Justin Bieber every single night)